“Heroes are made by the paths they choose, not the powers they are graced with.” ― Brodi Ashton, Everneath
Sometimes heroes come in the most unlikely forms. Like that of a granola bar. The story is from earlier this year and I must admit, it’s one of my favorite ones of the year so far. Now as fun as it is, there’s also so some good nuggets of wisdom that came from this experience, so pay attention because it can come in handy for you one day.
I had met this one girl randomly at a restaurant during happy hour when I as out with a buddy. She was there waiting for a friend but once I saw her I knew I had to strike up a conversation. She’s a solid 8.5, she’s about 5’5,” dark black her, big beautiful eyes and one of the most spectacular set of DD’s I’ve ever seen. Turns out she’s 39 and has two kids but actively keeps herself in great shape and knows how to have a great time. After chatting with her, my 6th guy sense, or “Dickth Sense” tells me she’s a lot of fun and that I’ll need to act fast, so I ask her what’s she’s up to later that night (it’s about 8pm). She says she has a quick PTA meeting but would be down to meetup after. So I setup an insta-date later that night and we grab a quick drink and hang another bar from 10:30pm until about midnight. The conversation was great, but it was a “school night” and she needed to get home so we parted ways.
Two weeks later I invite her out to hang with some friends of mine and she comes out and brings two friends. That night was a blast of a time, me and her wound up making out a lot in front of our combined group (including two very pissed off prospects of mine that I had also invited and my friend who was passed out…this story might be worth it’s own post later). At about 2:15am that night she hops an uber home while I help my passed out friend to his car and drive him home. Let’s call this girl Mia.
A week after that I hit up an LA hot spot with a buddy to talk some business. As we’re discussing business, I notice another girl give us the “up and down” eye-rape look which I make a mental note of as she walked by us. Me and my friend finish talking shop and are now shooting the shit about life. I notice the girl from before and her friend are standing close by, so I lean over to them and say “I have a random question; what’s the best airline?” This leads to a quick 1 minute conversation about how Virgin airlines is the best (and yes, they really are) and suddenly we’re now a group of 4. The girl that had given us “the look” is a solid 8, about 5’9″ and a half, blonde hair with a nice body and a very pretty face to match. Let’s call her Tess. Her friend (who turned out to be a former Knick’s cheerleader) was also stunning and so my friend was engaging with her.
I’m making small talk with Tess, like where she is from and why she is in LA, and it turns out her and her friend work for a high-end hotel chain and are in town for a conference. Tess lives in San Francisco but gets to travel to different cities for the hotel for various reasons. As I am talking to Tess for 2 minutes I get a very strong vibe and I think to myself “go for it,” so after having only known her for a total of 3 and half minutes, I pull her in for a kiss and we start making out. We continue chatting for another few minutes when Tess’ friend gets a text from one of their coworkers they are meeting up with at a different spot, so I grab Tess’ info so we can hangout since she is only in town for 5 more days. For the sake of the main topic of this post, I’ll end the story of this night right here. But I might need to post the full story later on because 5 minutes after she left I was giving another girl a piggy back ride across the bar and making out with her next to a fire pit while the manager was bringing me and my friend comped drinks. It was that kind of night.
The next day went something like this:
4pm: I ping Tess about meeting up at night and she replies that she’ll let me know where her group of coworkers plan to go.
6pm: That evening I go on a feeler date with the girl I met a week ago at the beach randomly. It was a nice and simple coffee date, but her personal story was a crazy tale of drug addition, issues with the law and family drama. I know red flags when I see them, but I still kept it friendly and we both had a good time enjoying each others company. I then dropped her back off at her place.
9pm: After the friend-date, I went to meet up with some friends in Culver City and we hit a spot we like to frequent when we are there. I get a text and it’s from Mia asking me what I am up to tonight. I tell her that I am out and about, but we should keep in touch and try to link up. It never hurts to have a back up plan for the night, in case if Tess falls through. I was really excited about Mia, but since she was local I had to bump her priority down because Tess was only in town for 5 days.
11:30pm: Tess texts me to let me know her group is at this cool spot, we’ll call it Bar X, and that she’s looking forward to me coming out. I let her know that I will head over shortly.
12:00am: I drive to Bar X, but I’m crazy hungry and I need something to give me a little energy boost plus to settle my stomach. So I drive an extra block to a liquor store and buy a granola bar.
12:05am: I eat said granola bar (which was delicious by the way) and I’m feeling like a new man. I’m ready to hop back in the car and park it at Bar X, when I get a text. It’s from Mia, and it reads “Hey I am at Bar X, you should come join me.” FUCK. ME.
12:07am: I cruise up the street to another hot spot to think. The problem with Bar X is that it’s not that big, and it’s a place a where I would certainly stand out so there’s no room for privacy. Now my options are:
1) I show up and choose Tess.
2) I show up and choose Mia.
3) I show up and try to leave with both of them.
4) I don’t show up, try to recruit at this current hot spot, and reschedule with both for another day.
12:15am: A choice is made. I went with option…drum roll…
Why? Because based on my interactions with both of them, the relationships where very new but both where high interest. I wanted both of them and was unsure about a potential threesome situation, but I knew I could have each of them separately, guaranteed.
12:20am: I text them both (separately) that I am making sure a drunk friend gets home ok, and that we’ll need to reschedule.
12:30am: I hear back from both of them letting me know that we’ll hang in the very near future.
All things considered it was a huge win, I wound up getting a few numbers that night, though admittedly my mind was too preoccupied with my current scenario to have enough concentration to go into full pull mode. But I did wind up hooking up with Tess 2 nights later (that story in of itself is an odyssey, as the next night I had a completely different girl over (not Mia) but Tess hit me up at midnight) and her last night in LA as well, and then I wound up hooking up with her again when I was up in San Fran. I wound up hooking up with Mia 2 weeks later, and that was one of the top 5 smash sessions I’ve ever had.
1) Having multiple options gives you clarity. If I was option-less and thirsty, I would have gone to the bar to see which option would pan out and would possibly lose both in that process. But since I had already been on a date that night, I knew Tess was around for 4 more days, that Mia was around since she is local, and add in the fact I had another girl coming over the next night, I was able to keep a clear head and make the most objective choice for myself. When you fear something it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy that sabotages you. Cultivate options, keep your head clear, and the pathways to what you want will become apparent to you.
2) Never put yourself in a situation you don’t control. Yes, there are always elements you can’t control (like having Mia of her own accord go to the exact same place I was going to meet Tess). But you can control how you react. Based on my sense with each, I did not think a threesome would be possible and that my hand would be forced to choose one, which still would have been a good scenario, but by rescheduling I was able to achieve both objectives, which was a great scenario. I could have walked into that bar and rolled the dice to see how it played out, but for what I wanted, I knew the best play was to give up that one night where my Frame would face a major uphill battle, which wound up leading to a scenario were I had 3 great nights with Tess and 4 amazing nights with Mia.
3) Always be on your A game. In this case my mind was preoccupied with a scenario but had I kept my concentration up I could have made other options happen for myself that night. Things worked out fine, but by the same token, no matter how good you are, there’s always room for improvement.
4) Enjoy the process. One of the biggest things that stands out from that whole night for me was when I was at the other hot spot so I “could think” and I had just told the two girls I couldn’t make it that night, I thought to myself; “What a great problem to have.” It’s an awesome feeling to have two girls unknowingly at the same place they both want you there that night. It’s also fun to have been “saved” by a simple act of getting a granola bar.
5) Be humble. Not going to lie, I did get a little ahead of myself that night at around 10pm when I was talking with my friends. I had been on a date, was supposedly meeting another girl later, had a 3rd one interested in hanging and had a 4th one scheduled for the following night. So yes, I did brag a little, but oh how quickly did the universe pull one over me. So when I write this post don’t think I’m trying to show of how great I am or that I’m hoping to impress you. The purpose of this post is in fact to serve as a “near-miss” story with some fun lessons in there. I don’t care about impressing people, what I care about is helping them learn and I use my own experience to help facilitate that. So if you think I’m epic or that I’m lame, it doesn’t matter to me. All I care about is if you picked up a a takeaway or two from my experience that can help you should you find yourself in a similar situation.
6) Heroes come in all shapes and sizes, and many times in the most unlikely forms. My hunger and need for a midnight snack led me to delay my trip in the quest for a granola bar, and that little 5 minute delay saved me from having to risk losing what turned out to be two separate but dynamite experiences with two awesome women.
So there you have it, a crazy night that made for a crazy tale. I hope you got some takeaways or at the very least where entertained. Thanks for reading and be sure to checkout my other posts as well. I’ve got more content to drop so feel free to follow me here or on twitter as well.