Appreciation Vs Value

Scales

“Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value.” –  Albert Einstein

One of the fundamental differences between the Alpha and Beta men that blue Pill men have a hard time differentiating is that one is appreciated, while the other is valued. For the Blue Pill man, appreciation = value, when this is not the case.

Appreciation

Appreciation is a nice thing to have on the surface, because it means people have noticed your efforts and are expressing recognition of it. The problem with appreciation is that the ball pretty stops at acknowledgement, but it seldom leads to action. This is why Blue Pill men are susceptible to the false sense of validation from appreciation, because they see that their investment and actions have been recognized so they feel that corresponding action is just around the corner.

What they fail to see is that appreciation is essentially a few nice words and a pat on the back, and that’s it. Hence why they tend to be orbiters of women that appreciate them for who they are but won’t have sex with them. They falsely assume that because these women appreciate them being different from other guys that eventually these women will come to act on that appreciation. But appreciation is an expression of gratitude, not an action of gratitude.

During my Blue Pill days I easily fell into that trap, as I had many female friends I was interested in dating. Doing the typical Blue Pill things I often received the “compliments” of “You’re a great guy, someone will be lucky to have you” or “I appreciate you as a person, don’t ever change.” In the beginning it was easy to keep on the same path because if people saw how different I was, eventually someone would act on it, right? But eventually the wool was pulled from my eyes as I noticed that what what people said the appreciated didn’t give me any success, and when I did a few things to break that mold, my success rate started improve dramatically. I suddenly realized that “appreciation” was a passive sentiment, not an actionable one.

Value

When a man is valued, he is a person worth going the extra mile and competing for. People will go out of their way to ensure that a man who is valued is happy, content and appeased. A man of value will enjoy the fullest of what people really have to offer, not just their gratitude. People will also make sacrifices for the sake of value as well. Value is an actionable state and you will want to take people at their actions and never their words.

I vividly remember when I had to breakup with my last ex girlfriend. She was a great person and actually was an excellent girlfriend, however, there where two major issues. First, what we wanted out of life was very different at the time, mainly she wanted to have kids very soon and I didn’t. Secondly, I am mildly allergic to dogs and she owned 3 of them, so there was always a bit of a hurdle. I knew calling it off was the right thing to do for the both of us, though it wasn’t an easy decision to make. During our conversation while I outlined those reasons, and I distinctly remember my ex offering to give up her pets for adoption. Now take a moment to think on that. She was willing to sacrifice her pets, which as many of you know how much women love their pets, which she’d also owned for years before even dating me in order to continue to our relationship. That’s an example of being valued. If she didn’t value you, she would have told me “see you later” and shown me the door. But she was willing to do whatever it took to keep me, and that’s a lesson I will not forget anytime soon.

That’s what makes the Red Pill a very empowering tool, is that one gets a much better sense of the how people actually operate. It helps you see appreciation for what it is, a carrot on the stick to keep you moving in one direction instead allowing you to see the entire carrot patch behind you.

To sum it all up

Be a person of value. If you find yourself being “appreciated,” then you’ve got some more work to do. This applies not only to your dating life but your professional life as well. How many employees are “appreciated” and then kick to the curb once their usefulness in done. A truly valued employee is someone that companies will try to poach and compete for and they will make large accommodations to keep them in the organization and happy. Entrepreneurship is the true way to go if you want to get ahead, but that’s another topic entirely and the point remains that if you presently have a job, you should test the waters to see if your company appreciates or values you. You should also do the same in all of your relationships, be them romantic, family or friends. Actions speak louder than words it’s always good to know who appreciates you will just stand back with a smile vs who values you and will take action on it. Know the difference.

Cheers.

Female Friends

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The Butterfly Effect

Sexy Wet

“Small shifts in your thinking, and small changes in your energy, can lead to massive alterations of your end result.” ― Kevin Michel

We are the end results of the choices we have made in life, and more often than not, those choices our influenced by our way of thinking.

Years ago, when I was making my initial transition from Blue Pill to Red Pill, my roommate at the time had a female friend of his from the east coast coming to visit LA and hang. I was down for some adventure, so all met up at a local Japanese bar to take full advantage of happy hour. My roommate’s friend, who we’ll call Lauren, was a cute, bubbly Jewish girl with very good boobs and a high energy level. Me and her hit it off pretty much instantly, and we all put the word “happy” in happy hour.

After the Japanese bar we went back to our house to continue hanging. We put on a movie and Lauren and I got cozy on the coach, and the once the movie was over my roommate stated that he was tired and was headed to bed. I took Lauren in my room to hang, and then we proceeded to hook up.

We were laying in bed and she asked me “When did you know you wanted to hook up with me?” I replied with “I pretty much knew after a few minutes…When was the moment you knew?” She responded with something seemingly arbitrary, but it would have a profound impact on my thinking and Game:

“Pretty much right away. I mean you where this tall, hot guy that was a lot of fun from the start.”

Now, as much as I enjoy the compliment, the phrase “hot guy” caused a drastic shift in my mindset. As mentioned before, I was at the beginning stages of my Red Pill journey, but that phrase “hot guy” ran in my head. I’ve had some minor success with women before hand, but never had I ever thought of myself as a “hot guy.” To me, a “hot guy” was always some other guy, some shirtless and shredded Chad like Brad Pitt in fight club. But for this girl, I was that “hot guy” which led to us hooking up. From then on, that mental shift would have a butterfly effect of me realizing my value as well as farthing my trek into Red Pill conversion. I’m grateful that a positive moment helped me transition further into the Red Pill rather than a traumatic one. I’ve now incorporated the mindset of “I’m a hot guy” in my Game and it’s yielded big results, as it’s help to solidify my confidence which led to many successful interactions with women in the future.

I share this story as an anecdote for you, in that perhaps there is a limiting belief you have or you never tried thinking of yourself in a certain way. A small mental shift, like “why would she go out with me?” to “why wouldn’t she want to go out with me?” can have a large impact on your success rate as well as the choices you make. If you were like me and never thought of yourself as “a hot guy,” imagine yourself that way and see types of results it can produce. Small changes, be it changes in your thinking, your style, or physique can have a cascading butterfly effect in your Game. Now is the time to experiment with small tweaks and see what results they produce, and then build upon positive results. If you’re a well seasoned vet, then you already know the power of small change and you’re continuously implementing them to keep your Game at it’s peak.

Go out there and conquer your goals. Cheers.

Woman rain

L’art De La Féminité (The Art of Femininity)

Jill Hennessy

“Femininity can be a powerful thing.” – Jillian Rose Banks

This post is a special one, in that it’s not discussing theory or field reports. Sometimes in the Red Pill community everyone gets so caught up in highlighting the negative or frustrating aspects of women, that all of the beauty and wonderment of them gets lost in the shuffle. This post is a shout out to femininity, to all the women who embrace it and to the women who know the art of it.

In the modern world, the art of femininity has become an increasingly rare commodity. Feminism and the betafaction of men has done a lot of damage to men with the Blue Pill, but it’s also done a lot of damage to women in their ability to express what truly is an art from. Like masculinity which is an art into itself, femininity has be chastised and turned on itself in an attempt to warp it into a perverted version of masculinity. But where there is oppression and attack, there is resistance, and prosperity.

Shout out to women who understand and embody the lost art of femininity. Women who look feminine and in their own unique way express their femininity through their actions. To the girls that know how to rock a stunning dress, know to utilize their feminine charm to create a sense of mystery and intrigue, to the women who know how to be a proper counter balance to men without trying to become men. Shout out to the women who grind right along with men in their own hustle rather than solely use them, who know how to blow our minds in the bedroom, and know how to a take care of themselves. Shout out to women who know how to cook, how to appreciate fine dining and how to make our days a bit brighter. And a big shout out to girls that are into threesomes, because that’s just awesome.

Women are a compliment to a man’s life, never the sole focus of it. But they can be a massive compliment with a very capable woman. In order to experience that as a man, you yourself must be a man that can bring it out of a woman. If she’s a Ferrari but you only know how to drive Honda Civics, then you need to get some driving school in and learn how to master that Ferrari to get the most out of it. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, women can be incredibly powerful, amazing and dynamic experiences. One of the great joys in life is coming across a truly feminine woman, who exudes and radiates it in every way. You represent the best that womankind has to offer.

Cheers.

Hannah Ferguson for Ellipse Serenity Lingerie lookbook (Summer 2013)

 

 

5 Reasons to Have Female Friends

Female Friends

“I think there’s something to the old saying that women use sex to get love, and men use love to get sex. And love is really just a word we use to describe a close bond, or relationship, between two people. Men have been programmed to want sex, so they do whatever is necessary to be in a relationship with a woman. And a woman is programmed to want the stability and (financial) security of a relationship, so she offers the man what he wants: sex.” ― Oliver Markus, Why Men And Women Can’t Be Friends

The topic of female friends is always an interesting debate within the Red Pill community. Some say never have them, others say it’s ok to have one or two. Personally, I find this topic to be pretty interesting and I have my own thoughts on the subject. As a Red Pill man I think it’s essential to have a core group of Red Pill (or close to it) male friends. As for female friends,  I think it’s not only possible but it’s important to have them as well. Below are my top 5 reasons why:

5. They provide first-hand validation of Red Pill truths. Once you become Red-Pill aware, you can’t unsee the truths it holds. This will be extremely evident in all of your relationships, especially those with pre-existing female friends. But, what this does allow is for you to go “go behind enemy lines” so to speak, in that you get a first hand view into confirming these truths for yourself. Suddenly, things you used to take at face value you can suddenly see the mechanisms behind the words or action, especially when your female friends discuss dating.  It’s always good to get a live reminder of how women operate so that way you can see just how Blue Pill men get used by women, but also frustrate women at the same time. You also get to see confirmations of how Alpha and Red Pill men are perceived and treated and these first hand observations confirm things in ways far more meaningfully than a forum post. So to sum it up, having female friends is a great way to get field confirmation of Red Pill truths so you can better understand them, learn about them, and then apply them for your own means.

4. They can be great bait. Female friends, especially attractive ones, are excellent bait, in the sense that they are perfect for arousing the curiosity of other females. Once you learn mastery over not being phased by a woman’s beauty and you adopt the abundance mentality, then being friends with attractive women is very easy. And an unintended perk of that is if you invite these female friends out to a fun venue, say a bar, club, event or even just the park; all other females in the vicinity will be instantly curious. I’ve been approached by many women when I am out with a female friend or several, and the first thing they want to know if “what’s your situation?” Having attractive female friends creates a rudimentary form of social proof. And when it comes to nightlife it makes the relationship very symbiotic, in that your female friends get to enjoy your presence and check out cool places, and you get to have instant social proof you can leverage to pickup other girls. Now remember your Red Pill principals, on having strong Frame will allow you to fully maximize this. If you’re that guy that’s with a bunch of female friends but you have no Frame and project a Beta vibe, then you’re going to be perceived as a girlfriend yourself. So the 2 big things to remember are keep your Frame strong and the more attractive your friends are, the better it the situation will be for you.

3. They can keep your plates in check. Another perk that female friends can provide, especially very attractive ones, is that they can keep your plates in check. We’ve all been in that situation where a plate gets a little too comfortable and starts trying up the shit test ante. Having solid Frame keeps that in check, but also doing a hangout with a plate and an attractive female friend works effectively in creating that sense of light dread. It’s a very live reminder of “I’m a man who keeps the company of attractive women, so I don’t need you as my sole source company.” Girls are very competitive, so playing that nature against itself works very effectively in your favor. And if you’re still a little Blue Pill and think that this is somehow morally manipulative, you need to understand that women are naturally far better players than men and are playing their own game. So you either need to be superior at your own game or find yourself trapped within the confines of her game.

2. They can be friends with benefits. If you have your Frame in check and are a high value man, then you’d be amazed at what situations you can create for yourself. Friends with benefits is always a great situation to have, and in order to have that situation, you need to first be friends. If you stick to your Red Pill principals and work an developing yourself and your Frame, then you’ll be able to foster these situations much more frequently at your discretion. The more experience you have the women, the better you’ll be with them, to them and for them.

1. It’s just good networking. One of my favorite quotes is “Life is a contact sport. The more people you contact, the better you’ll do. Having female friends is good networking, as with any friend it can lead to other romantic pursuits with other friends they have, experiences at at events, or even career opportunities. The key is to ensure that if you’re going to have a friendship, with anyone, they are a person of good character that adds value to your life, just like you will add value to theirs. Everything I listed above only works if you are a man of value who provides some type of value. If you’re just looking to be a leech or a taker without giving anything in return, then you need to do some seriously self evaluation and turn that ship around.

All in all having female friends can provide many perks and also helps give a balanced perspective on life. Remember, the purpose of the Red Pill isn’t to hate women or be anti women, it’s to help men better understand them so we can be the “men who other women want to fuck, and other men want to be.” If you hate women, then you’ve completely missed the point.

Thinking Man

5 Sex Tips To Up Your Sex Game

Sex Tips

“Is sex dirty? Only when it’s being done right.” ― Woody Allen

For this post I wanted to share a few tips that can help take your intimacy and sex game to the next level. A large part of sex is mental, and many of these tips are rooted in stimulating the mental game to make your physical game that much more powerful.

Let me get this out of the way and say that I am talking about activities between consenting adults. I know for most of you that have some sense this is apparent, but for those of you that might misinterpret my meaning, I only advocate consensual activities between adults. Now that that’s out of the way, on to the juicy content of this post.

5. The “Tantric Pause.” One idea from the Tantra is the concept of delayed gratification. The reasoning is that by delaying the gratification, the reward will be much more intense and pleasurable once received. Taking this idea, one thing I have found that makes make out sessions and sex much more intense is during heavy kissing or sex, to go in as if I am going to kiss the girl, but then stopping frozen when my nose is just about to touch hers. This creates a break in the action as well as a tease scenario, and by being able to hold still while looking directly in her eyes, it builds excitement, connection and anticipation. The best part is that it usually takes about 5 second before the girl becomes so overwhelmed with excitement and tension that she passionately will grab me and kiss me, allowing us to resume the activities with the passion amplified. She lost control and I didn’t; which not only shows the power of her desire for me; but also keeps the balance of Frame in my favor.

This is also a great display of discipline, as you will be demonstrating that even while having passionate, bed-breaking sex, you are still master of your domain and have absolute self control to be able to pause sex at will, just because you can. It shows you possess dominance, not only over her pleasure but also over your own, and that is a man that truly is Alpha and worth competing for.

4. Getting “lost” in a kiss. This is a passionate tease tactic that is the inverse of the Tantric Pause. This is something I usually do when saying goodbye, and is very useful when the relationship hasn’t been consummated yet. What this involves is during a goodbye make out session, I begin by being firm yet gentle with my kissing. Then, after a few moments, a sudden flash of hot and heavy gets introduced as I firmly squeeze her body into mine while giving her a long, hard, passionate kiss. I then immediately pull back with a smile while looking in her eyes.

What this does is give her a brief flash of raw, unfiltered passion which leaves her wanting to see how she can extract more of it from you. Also, it allows you to create the Frame of “being caught up in the moment” and allows her to get sucked deeper into the moment as well. The key is to be firm but gentle, passionate, but in control. The illusion is that you’ve temporarily lost control, but by pulling back it creates a bit of doubt as you “catch yourself.” This is a great note to end an encounter on and as they say in show business; “always leave them wanting more.”

3. The “out of the blue” ass-smack. This one has been discussed elsewhere plenty of times, but I love employing it so much that I had to share my thoughts. I only use this with women that I have had sex with. Mostly because after sex it feels way more natural, but also I feel that once you’ve had sex, this maneuver is best suited the present dynamic of the relationship. Essentially, this is giving a girl a firm, playful smack right on the ass, usually followed with a smirk and a wink, and can be done after sex or just hanging out, usually around the house.

This action reinforces the playful dynamic of the relationship as well as shows you’re not afraid to display some dominance every now and again. It’s like a subtle reminder of “that ass belongs to you” which is a playful way to play the conqueror. Hence why I only do this after I have had sex with a girl. To me, doing so before hand is not authentic in that the terrain hasn’t been conquered yet.

2. The “Villain’s Choke Hold.” This move is a next-level power move that if done right will show your dominance, raw physical strength and can drive a girl wild with passionate lust for you. The Villain’s Choke Hold is pretty much what it sounds like. While having passionate sex; and not hum drum “love making” because this maneuver will be way out of place; it’s best to do this with girl on top as it makes logistics easier. It can be done from missionary or if you’re fingering her to make her squirt, but for the sake of explaining this I will use the example of the girl being on top, in the cowgirl position. So, while having passionate sex with the girl on top facing me, I will suddenly sit fully up and place my hand around her throat. I will then firmly, but gently (remember, control is everything) squeeze to lightly choke her while I pull her face about an inch from mine and I stare intensely into her eyes, much like many villains do in movies where’ they are choking out some poor soul. After a few seconds I’ll continue to passionately have sex, usually pulling her in for a deep kiss first.

This move is a total show of raw dominance that works on several levels. First, on a primal level, it shows that your physical strength is literally capable of crushing her. She will be able to physically feel your power in way she hasn’t experience it before. That danger factor makes things more exciting and intense, and also shows that you have the physical capability to exert more force and could use this same force to defend her. Secondly, it’s a very overt showing your dominance and is a reminder that you can be an untamed wild man at times. This fierceness works as it shows your are the conqueror, not the conquered. Lastly, most men don’t have the balls to pull a move like this because they “don’t want to be even slightly rough with their delicate flower.” This move show’s you’re a man that takes what he wants, when he wants and is beholden only to his Frame and knows better than to put her on a pedestal and treat her like an equal sexual being.

Usually after doing this move the girl I am having sex with get a lot wetter and even more turned on, and in a few cases this move brought them to the edge of an orgasm and it only took a few strokes after to finish the job.

1. The “Jedi Breath Trick.” I call this one the “Jedi Breathe Trick” because it involves the girl having her eyes closed and having to rely on her sense of touch to feel you, much like a Jedi closing their eyes in order to “feel the force.” In order to do this, I will either use a sleeping eye cover or a tie (anything that can act as a blindfold will do) and cover the girl’s eyes. Then, while she is laying on her back naked, I will bring my face about an inch away from her body, and then I will exhale a hot, deep breath over her body. I usually start around the neck or stomach, and then I move my face all over her body as I exhale. I never do it in her face as that is not sexy, but what I usually do is run my breath over her body, starting around her breasts and then making my way down to her vagina. From there I will get between her legs, and then continue to run my breath between her inner things and vagina, before focusing my breather on her vagina, and eventually finishing with some licking or kissing that leads into eating her out.

What’s great about this technique is that it puts you in a dominate role as you are in full control of what happens next. And since her eyes are closed, she has no idea what you’re going to do next. By using your breath, you can let her “feel you” without physically touching her, as your warmth from your breath makes a soothing sound and the movement of your head moves the warmth to various parts of her body. Her not being able to see increases her anticipation as well as intensifies her sense touch, so she can experience a heighten sense of awareness.

Another great thing about this technique is that is can be combined with other things, such as she can be tied up to the bed as well or you can finger her while you breath over her breasts or do as I do and transition it into oral sex. A word of caution, sometimes a girl will be ticklish or a little overwhelmed by this, so she may squirm and writhe around uncontrollably and unexpectedly. I’d suggest starting around the neck or breasts and making your way south slowly, just to see how her body reacts. But the girls I have been with and myself have had a lot of fun with this, and several of them got so turned on they actually had orgasms when I moved my breath across their bodies down to their vaginas and focused my breath on their vaginas for a minute.

Final Thought

Please remember to excise control and be safe. Sex is a fun and amazing experience, but you can take things to far and you can physically injure yourself or other person. Also remember that sex is about consent, so if you try any of these and the person doesn’t respond positively to them, then you know this particular thing doesn’t do it for them. Keep it consensual and use your judgement. Try one or all of these out and see how they fit into your style and can impact your sex game.

Go out, live life and have fun doing it my friends.

Couple having sex on a bed at home

The Alpha Wingman

This guy

“You can be my wingman anytime” – Ice Man, Top Gun

Sometimes being an Alpha in a situation is not about using your Frame for your own benefit, but sometimes it’s about using it to help others. This post covers just such a situation that happened recently on a night out with a friend.

Field Report

I was hosting a friend of mine from out of town. He’s a young guy, in his mid twenties and is usually more of the quite and shy type at first, but opens up more once he’s comfortable in a situation. I decide to take him out for a Saturday night of fun and we go to this restaurant and lounge that I frequent in a hip and busy part of town. I like the place because it has a great atmosphere and energy, great food, great drinks, and is close to a lot of other places. It’s also frequented by many beautiful and diverse women, which makes it the prime location for a proper night out.

We get to the venue and go inside for a round of drinks. Since I frequent this place, all of the staff knows me, from the General Manager to the bar-backs, so I’m being greeted and am introducing my friend to them. After hanging out for about 30 minutes, I spot a pair of girls sitting at the end of the bar. One is blonde, with a curvy figure, and the other is a redhead with bright blue eyes and a petite figure. Both girls look to be in their mid thirties, but I know my friend has a thing for older women. I point out the redhead, which is the type of girl he usually goes for and said “I think I found someone you should go meet.” My buddy responded by saying “I’m not sure what the move is,” and so at this point I knew that I would need to take command of the situation.

“Follow my lead,” I told him, as I walked over to the girls. As I was making my way over, someone bumped me so my drink spilled a little onto my hand, so when I got up to the girls I asked if they could pass me a napkin since they where sitting next to them.

“That you for that act of bar-decency,” I said. “The bar is a lawless place and most of the time people just act insane.” Both girls laughed and then I quickly introduced myself and my friend to them. “So what brings you guys out tonight?” I inquired. “Well, we’re out to celebrate my cousin’s birthday,” said the blonde as she pointed to the redhead. “Well happiest of birthdays to you!” I said to the redhead as I gave her an enthusiastic high-five. “How did you guys know to come here?” I asked. “Where were at another bar, but there where no guys so we had heard of this place and came here.”

From there I knew we had a golden scenario. A birthday, which is a reason to celebrate. Check. They had come to this venue specially for guys. Double check. All that was left was to take the reins of the situation.

“You ladies came to the right place,” I said. “We are going to ensure that you have a proper birthday celebration.” I raised my glass and all four of us toasted to the birthday girl. We had some small talk, about what we all did and it urns out the blonde works for a Hollywood agency and the redhead is a college professor. As it turns out, they both had recently moved into the this particular area of town and they were looking to explore it more. They liked the current venue because the redhead leaved about a mile away from it. I asked them if they had been to this other lounge that is close by that I frequent, to which they replied they had hear good things but never had been. “Finish up those drinks, we’re moving out!” I said as I finished my beverage and then called for my tab.

The 2 girls, my friend and myself all made our together to the lounge I had mentioned, and I texted the General Manager there who is a buddy of min that I was en route. I got a “Fo sho playa” response back from the GM and told the ladies that they where going to like this spot a lot. This lounge is a bit of hot spot and sure enough, there was a large line out front as we arrived. I lead the group right up to the front and gave the door guy I know a solid handshake and then a hug to the girl that helps run the door as well. We then strolled right past the line and proceeded to the lounge area. As soon as we got in my buddy who is the GM greeted me and said “It’s a packed night but we have a table set aside for you. Enjoy my man.” The Assistant GM then lead us through the sea of people to a table and we got situated with myself next to the blond facing my friend and the redhead on the other side.

“What just happened?” The redhead asked. “We’re celebrating your birthday, so we are going to do it properly,” I told her. We then ordered some drinks and I made the promise that we would find birthday cake for the birthday girl to ensure the night was flawless. Our drinks arrived and my friend worked his game on the redhead as they got a little more cozy and I chatted up the blonde. After about 15 minutes, I then told the blonde that she should checkout the rest of the lounge and I took her on a tour of the space to give my friend and the redhead some 1 on 1 time.

After the tour of the of the lounge, which deliberately took 20 minutes, we rejoined the table. Once it hit 1 am, I told the group “Time for a field trip,” so we paid our tab then I took us all to a convenience store to look for some type of cake to act as a birthday cake. Since no cake could be found, we grabbed a bunch of peanut butter M&M’s, which is the birthday girl’s favorite candy. I also grabbed a bottle of wine and some matches. I paid for all of the item and then as we walked out of the store I turned to the redhead.

“So we’re going back to your place to continue the celebrations since it’s around the corner? My place is about 20 minutes from here.” She paused for a minute and then said “Ok! I wasn’t planning to have folks over, so I will need to tidy up for a quick minute before anyone comes in.” I smiled and said “Whatever the birthday girl desires.” We made our way to her place, which only took 5 minutes, and then both girls went upstairs to her place to tidy it up. My friend then said “Man, thank you for wingmanning, this has been great!” I turned to him and said “Ok this is how it’s going to go down. We’re going to head up there, have some wine and celebrate for about 30 minutes. Then people are going to get tired, at which point I will take the blonde back to her place and you’ll be good to go.” My friend nodded his head excitedly, and after a few more minutes the girls came back down to let us know we could head in.

We all got up stairs to continue the birthday theme of the evening by finding a few leftover candles and lighting them with the matches I had picked up. We all held glasses of wine and some peanut butter M&M’s while we sang Happy Birthday to the redhead. We then paired off and got settled on the couches and began discussing random topics, from different us cities to movies. Sure enough, after about 1 glass of wine and 30 minutes, the blonde said “I’m starting to get sleepy.” I responded by saying, “Same here, it is pretty late.” I then stood up and said, “We’ll I think I am going to head off,” I then turned to the blonde. “You’re an awesome amount of fun, I’ll give you a lift back to your place so you don’t have to call an Uber.” “Are you sure?” She asked. “Not a big deal,” I replied. “Plus I live in that direction anyway and can hop the freeway back home.” “Ok,” the blonde replied. The redhead then looked at me and asked “What about him?” as she looked at my friend. “No worries,” I said, “I’ll give you to some time. I’ll come back and pick him up after I make sure your friend gets home safely.” Of course, what I was thinking was “I’ll come back and pick him up tomorrow morning,” and I proceeded to say goodbye to the redhead and was quickly followed by the blonde.

The blonde and I then left the redhead and my friend and we proceeded to drive to her place on the other side of town. We got to her street and there was no where to park, so I threw on my hazard lights and prepared to say goodbye to the blonde. The blonde then looked at me and said “I should text my cousin so she knows I got back safe.” Knowing this might cause a potential cock-block, as it might imply that I would be en route back to pick up my friend, responded by leaning in close and then making out with the blonde. After making out  and playing with her large breast for a few minutes, I pulled back and said “Sucks there is no parking.” The blonde gave me a naughty look and said, “You can come inside next time.” Sure enough, a week later I would in every sense of the phrase. But that night, she returned home and I jetted back to my pad to get some much earned sleep. The following day I texted my buddy in the morning and picked him up from the redheads place.

This story is a bit of a longer one, but it is full of some key tips and ideas for you to take away.

Takeaways

6. Having venues locked down is a huge plus. Nothing can kill your momentum faster than dealing with hangups at venues, be it trying to get in or trying to grab drinks and find a place to be comfortable. Having a venue that you have locked down not only makes logistics silky smooth but it also enforces your Frame as a high value individual. Like in this example, having the staff know me at the first venue gave me social proof and boosted my status. Then, moving to the next venue, that status and Frame were further reinforced by bypassing the line and then getting a table instantly in a busy place. This also had the added effect of making the transitional logistics smooth and easy, which makes the impression of status high and well as keeps the momentum building and going, rather than hitting a wall.

 

5. Logistics are half the battle. When I am out and am suggesting other places to checkout, I ensure that they are logistically easy and close to each other. a long travel time can kill your momentum. Doing recon before and during your night is key. Since I frequent the area, I have great knowledge of all venues and their relative proximity to each other. Also, when it came up during the conversation that the redhead lived very close to where we were, that made her place the ideal go-to stop to continue the night once the bars closed.

 

4. Frame is a powerful tool. In this particular night, I used Frame to be the best wingman I could be. From the initial approach to taking the group from one lounge to the other, then to a convenience store and then back to one of the girl’s houses, that was only made possible because I defined and held the Frame. I used the theme statement of “It’s your birthday, we’re going to celebrate it properly” as the base that Frame operated from and it made for an adventure that everyone else was more than happy to be a part of.

3. Don’t ask. Subtly command. Part of Frame and game is learning to subtly give commands and not go about it by asking in a Beta way. What I mean by this is when I said “Finish up those drinks, we’re moving out!” I was giving the command of “finish your drinks, we are going to relocate to another venue,” rather than asking “Hey do you guys want to go see this other place?” By taking command of the situation I was able to hold Frame and steer the direction of the night. Other cases of this from that night were when I said “Time for a field trip,” and then leading the group to a convenience store, and then once we where done at the store saying to the Redhead “So we’re going back to your place to continue the celebrations since it’s around the corner?” I was dictating how the night was going to go, and then last example of that was near the end when we were hanging at the redhead’s place and I stated to the blonde “You’re an awesome amount of fun, I’ll give you a lift back to your place so you don’t have to call an Uber.” I was telling her not to call an Uber, I will be taking her home. Now there is a fine line, you don’t have to be an asshole in a commanding way, and sometimes you’ll get some push back to subtle commands. That’s fine and comes with the territory. NEVER FORCE ANYONE TO DO SOMETHING THEY DON”T WANT TO DO. I know most of you reading this already know that, but for those of you that might miss my meaning, I am not advocating forcing people into situations without their consent. Commands establish reinforce your Frame in an authentic way and is a great way to test how well people fall into it.

2. Know how to follow the lead. Nothing is more frustrating that doing a lot of setup to get the baton to the next runner and then to have them drop it half a second into you trying to pass it on. My friend did an excellent job of following my lead and playing off of me, so the combination was extremely effective. You can be Alpha and have Frame by following the lead of another person’s strong Frame. This can help establish your own Frame with a particular person or group and makes for an effective 1 – 2 punch. If you’re rolling out with a wingman and you guys can’t play off each other or follow each other’s leads as needed, you success rate is going to plummet, so make sure you both can either take the lead or follow the lead.

1. Have fun. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in the outcome that we forget to take a step back and just enjoy the ride. One of the best highlights of the night for me was being able to have a fun time while helping a friend run his game on a girl he was attracted to. But all of us had a really fun time as we took the theme of “proper birthday celebrations” and ran with it. From the first venue to the second then the convenience store and then finally at the redhead’s house, the entire night was a fun time we all participated in. If you focus on having fun, then whether your get laid or not at the end of the night you’ll have a great time regardless. And as a bonus, having that attitude usually gets you laid more.

The More You Know

The Enemy

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“Know your enemy and know yourself and you can fight a hundred battles without disaster.” – Sun Tzu, The Art of War

For this post I wanted to further delve into a theme that’s been fairly recurring in my recent conversations. I’m not a fan of quoting myself, but for the sake of getting into this topic my hand is forced:

As a man, it’s paramount that you understand that women aren’t the enemy, but their natures will eat you alive and spit you out if you do not understand them.

So with that in mind, here we go.

Women Are Not The Enemy

Many men get caught in the mindset that women are their enemy, for various reasons. Plenty of AFC’s and Blue Pill men become frustrated and bitter over time after many rejections, divorce or general non-success they experience. A lot of men new to the Red Pill or transitioning to it get sucked into the mindset as well, and it’s pretty easy to see why. When the truth is shown and women’s mating and provisioning strategies are exposed, it can come as a cold, hard slap in the face that make man men view women with contempt, suspicion and anger. Extremes are always a red flag, and finding yourself with an extreme view on women should cause you to pause and give yourself some examination.

Now, this is not to say that there are not bad, malicious women out there. There are plenty of damaged or just plain crazy women in this world and yes, they these women are best avoided and are in a sense an enemy to your sanity and future. But to blanket this view to all women is not healthy, it’s narrow minded and it hurts you as it limits your experiences. Women can be amazing, dynamic and incredible experiences and can help give one insight into themselves as well as the world around them. But as mentioned in many places before, women should be a compliment to your life, never the sole focus of it. Learn how to weed the malicious one’s out, attract the complimentary ones and you’ll discover that women can be an incredible icing on the cake that is your life.

The Nature of Women

As others have outlined before, the nature of women is straightforward when you break it down. Women are pragmatic in their approach to love and relationships and as such they care more about the stats a man possesses. Your status, how good looking you are and how you conduct yourself are all huge factors. Women are attracted to man for what he is not who he is. Women don’t really care who Leonardo DiCaprio is, if he’s a nice guy, does he love kittens, or what his favorite pizza toppings are. They are attracted with what he is; a handsome, successful man that is A-List (high status) and famous (has large social proof).

This is not a “right or wrong” rant, it’s a mere statement of facts. So if you’re looking at this and saying “it’s wrong that they don’t value a man for who he is on the inside” then you’re missing the point. This is how the mechanisms for attraction with women work. It is what it is. There’s nothing inherently wrong with this either, because given the history of women they’ve literally had their survival tied to the man they pair with, so if they are going to invest their future with someone, they are going to ensure it’s the best deal they can get. On the flip side, men are hard-wired for visuals. If you see a 400 pound woman you instinctively are not going to look at her folds of fat and think “well she’s loves dogs and reads stories to orphans” and find yourself attracted to her. That’s not how attraction for guys work, hence the huge push these days for the “Big is Beautiful” movement. It’s an attempt by women to dictate to men what we should be attracted to. Well guess what, if you’re upset and ranting about why women should value you based on who you are on the inside, you’re doing the exact same thing but from the other side of the coin. “It’s what on the inside that counts” is the male equivalent of of the “Big is Beautiful” movement. Women can’t dictate to men what attraction for us is, and men can’t dictate to women what attraction for them is either.

Learn how that attraction works and then you can “hack” your own attractiveness so to speak. Is it going to be a magic bullet that has a 100% success rate? No. Nobody is at 100%, not even DiCaprio. But you can greatly improve your success rate, and improvement is always a goal worth striving for. If you want to attract more women, know what they are attracted to. As a hunter, you need to use the proper bait to attract prey. You won’t use carrots to attract a lion, so don’t think that just being a good person on the inside is going to cut it when it comes to attracting women. By all means, continue to be that good person on the inside, but you can add to your stat sheet as well to make you even more attractive. Think outside in vs inside out. If you were a pair of heels your stats like wealth, looks, and swagger are the exterior design of the shoe which draws women in. You being a good person is the bonus of the heels being comfortable and having a nice interior, but it’s not the most critically important factor. If you have no idea what I’m talking about, ask any girl about a pair of heels and why they like and wear them, especially when most of the time they are uncomfortable and painful.

The Real Enemy

Ignorance is the real enemy, and as they say “ignorance of the law is no excuse.” Arm yourself with knowledge, don’t be mad or throw a fit at how things are, see the game and know how to play it. You don’t blame a lion for eating a gazelle or call it evil. It’s a lion being a lion and doing what lions do: Hunt and eat gazelles. The same applies to women and how they approach relationships. They approach it from a pragmatic viewpoint and see things through the lens of what you are, not who you are. Love women, but have open eyes about their nature. If you want more success, develop yourself into a person of higher value, plain and simple. Maximize your potential, grow your status, your value and exercise to develop your body as well. When it all comes down to it, your personal success is tied to your biggest asset and your worst enemy: You.

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